Random

...because I know you love it. Okay, I don't know that. Maybe you hate it. But, mostly because it's easy for me.

• Another awesome thing that I caught myself saying out loud the other day: "Roman, don't step on Uncle Tony's head."
• Roman loves to sing. He memorizes song lyrics so quickly. One of his all-time favorite songs is Mighty to Save. The other day, my mom was with us when he happened to be belting it out in the car. She asked me how much I think he understands. My response was something like, "I don't know, but to me, it doesn't really matter. At least it's in his mind and in his heart. Even if he doesn't understand much now, hopefully with time, more will sink in, and maybe some of those words will come back later in life when he needs them". Well, just a few short days later, we were at church and he was looking at his little picture Bible. He was really examining the page about the resurrection. All of a sudden he tapped me on the shoulder, and excitedly whispered "Mommy! Jesus is conquering the grave! He's conquering!" I was one proud mama.
• Some of my favorite things about Judah these days: he says "sbappers" for "slippers". The way he tries to sing Happy Birthday. He says "Sorry did dat" everytime he gets in trouble. It's in a really deep voice and it makes me laugh every time...not so good for disciplining.
• goodreads.com Seriously. Go get an account. We can be friends.
• I LOVE Advent. So happy to have a Christmas tree up and to be preparing myself and my family for the coming of the King.
• Another ultrasound next Monday. Please pray for us!
• Blessings to you all!

I'm not behind or anything...

So, I am pretty much horrible at being organized or doing anything in a timely fashion. I wasn't always this way. (Well, I may have always had these tendencies, but let's just say that I'm at the peak of not organiztion.)

So, please forgive me for the delay in this message. But, trust me, it will be worth the wait!

I'm proud to introduce you to my new nephew, Jack Vernon:

This little man was born Nov 9, weighing in at 8lb 7 oz. Isn't he handsome?

What. A. Buddy!

His big brother likes him quite a bit!

Jim and Chelsey with Carter and Jack

What a beautiful family! We are so happy for you guys and we feel so blessed to call these two little boys our nephews!

It's only killing me a tiny bit that I won't be able to hold that sweet baby until this spring! I am so looking forward to it.

Another Pumpkin Recipe

Because we've been on a pumpkin kick...
and because, as Tony says, "they're so fluffy!!" (he ate 9 on his drive to SC)...
and because they are absolutely delightful...

try these:

Frosted Pumpkin Cookies

The One Where I Ponder the Kitchen and the Heart

I haven't posted much lately because I am having a hard time putting my thoughts and feelings into words. It has been challenging to sort through the emotions of everything that has happened in the last month. Throw in extra crazy-pregnancy-emotions and you get a bunch of ridiculous blubbering that makes no sense whatsoever.

I actually typed out a whole post the other night and when I went back to read through it, I realized that it actually sounded like I was illiterate. It was just a bunch of words that made no sense together. Aren't you glad I didn't post that one?? :)

Anyway, I am going to try again.

The last month has been scary. I think I've pretty much already covered all the bases there.
The last month has been miraculous. God is so good and so faithful to us.
The last month has been humbling.

I know I have already said it, but I am so overwhelmed with all the help that I have received, especially from the AMAZING women at our church. It is so neat when you just a get a call saying "hey, I'm coming over on Tuesday to take the boys to the park so you can rest" or "hey, what day would you like to borrow a teenage daughter? She can play with the kids and clean your house." Seriously? I feel so so blessed. It has really made me think about the kind of woman I want to be and what I am doing right now in order to become that woman.

I feel like there are so many days that I go through my routine trying to "get by" instead of being purposeful. I hate that.

Most recently, I feel like there are days when I dwell on what I can't do--on my limitations-- instead of what is important. For example, I am not supposed to be lifting heavy things or doing anything strenuous. That means little things you wouldn't think of like laundry baskets, trash bags, little boys who don't want to go where you want them to, etc. Yes, it's frustrating to have a messy house and to not be able to lift my little guys. But does that really matter? What is the most important thing to me?

What is the point of keeping up the false appearance that I always have my act together? (that is what it has become. Sometimes I just want to have a clean house, and a delicious meal on the table, with well behaved children so that people will think I'm doing a good job) But, is that accomplishing my ultimate goal to unconditionally love my kids and show them what it means to know, love, and serve the Lord daily...despite our circumstances? And what is a "good job"? And who determines that? I think it's this: "I want to be faithful in everything, even if no one sees but Him." I answer to Him.

I am far from perfect. Far from the perfect parent. Far from the perfect wife. Far from the pefect homemaker.

So, here is my confesssion of the day:

I raise my voice sometimes. Sometimes I downright yell.
I lose my patience. A lot.
I haven't mopped my floor in weeks.
Sometimes I put in a second movie just to be able to sit quietly with my feet up.
There are days when I put my kids to bed knowing that I didn't teach them anything new.
I suck at being consistent with my God time.
My counters are sticky.
There are days when I realize that bedtime prayer is the only time I have talked to the boys about Jesus all day.
Sometimes I am rude and disrespectful to my husband.
There are days when I voice a lot more complaints than I do positive thoughts.
Sometimes I am totally selfish and want to do my own thing with no one bothering me.
I let laundry pile up for days at a time. And I don't fold my children's clothing. Ever.


I'm not proud of those things, but I needed to tell you. Because who am I helping by pretending to be the perfect mom and wife? I know I'm not really fooling anyone. This striving to seem like I have my act together all the time? It's actually pride...keeping me as a slave to himself. I'm done with that. I would rather be spending my time becoming a woman who serves her family and her friends, lovingly, no matter what the kitchen looks like.

Don't get me wrong, I like a clean house as much as the next mom, but I'd rather have a clean heart.

A little Bit of Everything

So, even after all of my unloading in this post, I still hadn't realized how heavy my heart has been for the past month until we got the good news at our ultrasound last week. It's literally like a weight has been lifted. Yay for Jesus being awesome.



Now I need to catch you up on some good Roman and Judah stories!



A couple of weeks ago, Roman and I went to visit my friend Lindsay. She was kind enough to make us all kinds of fun treats to eat when we were there. One thing she had to offer was candy corn. Roman was lovin that. He kept sneaking more after I told him to stop...until I caught on and finally he gave it a rest. But, it was enough that he was all hyped up on sugar as we were leaving.

As soon as we started walking out to the car, it got really bad. He was rolling around in the leaves and would not follow me to the car. I didn't mind him playing in the leaves for a couple of minutes, but then he was seriously getting out of control. Usually if I ask him "Roman, are you going to come like a big boy, or does Mommy need to help you?" he comes right away. He's all about doing things by himself. So, when that didn't work, I just went and grabbed his hand and he came to the car. He was still squirming and squealing though...all in excitement. He could hardly even sit down in his car seat. Finally I kind of raised my voice and he snapped out of it. He looked at me very seriously and said "I had too much candy corn". HA-larious.

Then as we were driving away, I said "Roman, I had such a fun day with you!"
To which he replied "CANDY!!!!"
Love you too.

10 minutes later he was completely passed out.

Moral of the story: if you want your kid to completely OD and crash on sugar, just give them candy corn. But, remember that first you'll have to deal with the beloved sugar high. :)

My other favorite things about Roman right now are that he loves "Jamma days" because I let them stay in their pajamas occasionally...but now it's become a daily request. And that he loves letters. He is starting to write some words like "cat" and "hat".

And our sweet Judah...
He is talking all the time now...sometimes whole sentences of only-God-knows-what, but it's pretty stinking cute. We are slowly learning to understand more of his words though, and he is getting clearer and clearer. Here's what Judah has been saying:

• "Puppies Everywhere" - when he wants to read Puppies, Puppies Everywhere
• "go sleep"
• "bless you"
• "I ate it all" - which comes out more like "i a it ahh"
• "oh my goodness"
• "See me?" - in a really high pitched voice when he wants to come see you.
• "where did he go?" - while playing peek-a-boo...this one is pretty hard to understand, though
• "set...go!"
• "that's nice"
• "Buzz" - as in Lightyear. Duh.
• "bapple" for "apple" :)
• "oh no"
• "ah, man!"
• "boy", "sky", "house", and lots of other daily vocab type words...these are just his favorites. he must like the way they sound because he repeats them a lot.
• "Cookies? Cake?" at the end of almost every meal...just in case I might have a treat for him
• "get down" and "sit down" - probably because that's what he hears every 5 minutes. He's a good climber!
• "yep"
• He is also starting to count and can say some ABCs...still pretty random orders though. :) And he can say colors, but doesn't identify any yet.

These boys are SO much fun! It makes me so excited to see what the dynamic will be like with three of them running around!

It has been really hard for me to adjust to not lifting the boys. Mostly Judah. I know that I am being a good mom to our third little guy when I am taking it easy, but it makes me feel like a not-so-good mom to Roman and Judah. I know it's just because they don't understand, and that it is a short period of time.

Praise the Lord I have had so much help over the last several weeks! First of all, I can't say enough about my husband. He is such a good dad and has taken on so much more around the house since I am trying to do less. He puts up with all my crazy pregnancy hormones, and is so good at calming my fears. In our couples' group last week, I got all emotional when they talked about the man being the Christ figure. He has been exactly that during this whole experience. I love you, Joe.

On top of that, I have my friends and our amazing church family. I am so blessed to have several "Titus 2 women" in my life. You know who you are...and I am so so thankful for you. Thanks for teaching me what it means to be a Godly woman.

And, let's not forget my incredible brother, Tony. He has been such a blessing to our family. He deserves some kind of award for all the dishes, and diapers, and other dirty jobs he has done.

So...that was all over the place...but at least it was an update! I have been so horrible about writing lately. Please know I'm praying for all of you and your families!

Ultrasound

Hello friends!

Well, we had another ultrasound yesterday, and I am excited to tell you that we got some good news!

Really this ultrasound was not so much to look at the placenta...it was to look at the baby's spine. The last time we went in, he was feeling a bit stubborn (imagine that...my child...stubborn?) and wouldn't roll over. So, the ultrasound tech couldn't see his whole spine. She said everything else looked fine and she had no reason to think it wouldn't be normal, but we had to come back anyway. I always like to see the baby, so it was fine with me!

They usually wouldn't check on the placenta until 28 weeks - which is another month from now. So, when we went in, she reminded us that we wouldn't necessarily know anything different yet. But right away when she looked she said, "Oh, well that's moved some. I'm going to call it a partial previa". This is very encouraging news, because if the uterus continues to grow the way it has been, it's quite possible that when they check again at our next ultrasound, it will be completely out of the way!

So, basically, thank you, THANK YOU for your prayers! Keep them coming because they are WORKING!

We are not completely "out of the woods" yet, of course. I still need to maintain the same precautions that I have been taking to be sure that we don't put any undue pressure on the placenta. But we are hopeful that this movement, and the continued movement of the placenta might give us the chance to have another natural birth!

And, even if the placenta doesn't move any more, even if we still have to have a C-section, a partial previa is much less of a risk to the baby's safety.

But, as we have seen, God is bigger than this situation and we are so thankful for the way he has been faithful to hear and answer our prayers!

Thanks again for joining us on this journey! Love you you all...

Jeremiah 29:12

Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.

Pumpkin Pancakes!

I made pumpkin pancakes for breakfast yesterday and they were a big hit with my family! I found a recipe here but added some brown sugar to the mix for good measure! (I had to) :) Here was my final product. Enjoy!

Pumpkin Pancakes
(makes 8-10 pancakes)
2 cups flour
1/2 cup brown sugar
1 Tbsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp cinnamon
1/4 tsp nutmeg
1/4 tsp ginger

1 1/2 cups milk
1/2 cup canned pumpkin
1 egg
1 1/2 Tbsp vegetable oil

Mix all dry ingredients in large mixing bowl and set aside. Mix all wet ingredients in small bowl. Add wet ingredients to dry ingredients and stir until combined. Batter will be thick.

I would cook these pancakes at a slightly lower temperature than you might use with plain pancakes (I did medium-low) because they are very fluffly and nobody wants a brown pancake that's not cooked in the middle, right?

Delicious when lathered with butter and drenched in maple syrup!

Let me know if you try them!

To post or not to post...

So...here's the deal: I have gone back and forth about a hundred times as to whether or not I should post this on my blog. I have been reading it and editing it, and saving it and coming back to it...I guess we'll see what I really think when I get to the end of writing and have to decide whether or not to click "publish post". :)

All of this is probably going to come out in one big jumbled mess. So, take it or leave it. If you feel like it's TMI, feel free to sit this one out. I promise I won't be offended. I am (I think!) going to post this and any subsequent posts in order to keep people in the loop about our third pregnancy. And, more than that, we would love to ask for your prayers.

As most of you know, our ultrasound showed that we have another healthy baby boy on the way! Praise God!

It also showed that I have a Placenta Previa.

I would link to something that tells you more about what that means, except that I don't like reading about medical issues online. Too scary. :)

Here's the gist of the situation: As of right now, the placenta is completely covering the cervix, so unless my uterus grows in such a way that the placenta moves, baby can't get out that way. The doctors say that it's not likely the placenta will move at this point in the pregnancy.


We say God can do anything.


So, we are hopeful (not hoping) - I am learning there is a difference. We are hopeful because God is good all the time. We are hopeful that God will move the placenta and that we will be able to have a natural delivery.

If God chooses not to change our circumstances, (and in that case, we will not be hopeless, because God is unchanging...remember, He's good all the time?) that will mean that baby will be delivered via C-section. It also means that I may have to be on bed rest towards the end of the pregnancy. Regardless of what God does or allows, we trust that it is all in His plan.

In the mean time, I am supposed to be taking it easy. I am not allowed to lift my children, or do anything strenuous. I am still trying to figure out what that means considering I live with Roman and Judah. :)

I would be lying if I said I'm not scared. I would love to say that I am totally at peace and willing to go wherever God will lead us...but fear is, for me, the biggest way that Satan tries to get me to doubt God. Just the thought or mention of a possible complication makes me my mind reel in images, scenarios, and worst-case thoughts. Throw in words like "placental abruption", "hemorrhage", or "dangerous for mom and baby" and...well...I have to stop and remind myself to breathe normally again.

How likely are any of those complications? I don't know. And I'm not really interested in finding out. Because, honestly, it doesn't matter. God will have his way in this no matter what the statistics show. And that's what we want anyway.

This has been a difficult thing for me to write about and talk with people about - not because I don't feel comfortable sharing, but because I'm afraid that people will think I'm being over dramatic or that I will come off as either naive or not trusting God enough. The reality is, in a few weeks, I might be saying "scratch that...none of this is even an issue anymore!" I would love to honor God by showing that he is faithful to us in that way. But if he chooses to be faithful to us in another way, in a way that people don't necessarily understand to be "answered prayer", I want to honor Him then, too.

Does any of this even make any sense? In one sentence I say how much I trust God, and in the next, I say how scared I am? Is that even possible? Am a total hypocrite? Is it both or neither?

I just know that I honestly feel both.

So there ya have it.

We have another ultrasound and doctor's appointment on Monday, and again 4 weeks after that, so I'll update again as I know more. We are anxious to see how God will move in our lives and in the life of this sweet little guy. Please pray that He will be glorified in our family, no matter the situation.

"pray for me...that I won't spoil God's beautiful work." - Mother Theresa

Small Steps to Big Stupid

You should probably read this post over at Stuff Christians Like. So good.

Baby Clothes

So, I have been looking for a coming home outfit for our new little bundle of joy.

I haven't found anything that I really wanted yet, although there are lots of cute options.

And many ridiculous options.

Let me put it this way: if you pay $50 for a coming-home-from-the-hospital outfit, you are an idiot. What I meant to say is, you may want to rethink that decision. Your baby will probably wear that outfit for all of 5 minutes and quite possibly destroy it with some kind of bodily fluid.

I'm all about getting something cute and special, but let's be realistic.