Family Life: Then and Now.

Sometimes people are surprised that we are so young and have three boys so close together (and so crazy when they are "working" together). :) Is it an easy job? Nope. And it has left me reflecting on my life before children.

Before I had children...
I had cushions on my couches.
I had money to spend on jewelry and eating out.
I had a whole night's worth of sleep every night.
I had couches without stains from dripping sippy cups.
I had mirrors and windows that were free of streaks from sticky little fingers.
I had counters that were free of goldfish crumbs from snack time.
I had time to myself.
I had endless one-on-one time with my husband.
I had relaxing evenings with friends...no chasing or disciplining to interrupt conversation.
I had the ability to take a nap whenever I wanted to.


Now I have...
Cushions stacked for the next big jump

little money to spend on things for myself. I regularly purchase diapers and spider man shirts...and wait to "splurge" on things that I used to consider necessities for myself...like a new calendar. I'm living on the wild side.

Nights filled with one or more of the following: my fifth trip to the bathroom because baby Silas keeps thinking that my bladder is a trampoline, rocking a boy who has had a bad dream, or an early morning wake up because those boys are too excited about life to sleep. Soon to add to the list: nursing a newborn every two hours.

Lots of sippy cup stains. Everywhere. Bonus if you find a week-old sippy full of milk under a piece of furniture.

Little hand prints on every piece of glass in sight.

Goldfish crumbs, raisings, and cheerios on the counters and floors. Constantly.

Occasionally I get a naptime to myself (like right now....ahh, savor the silence!). And sometimes after they are in bed.

Again, after bed time I get some one-on-one time with Joe. Date nights out are a big treat!

Evenings with friends are filled with toddlers and newborns...oohing and ahhing over the newest baby and the oldest child's newest accomplishment. There is talk of height and weight percentile, how we got the one year old to put himself to sleep, the diaper disaster of the week, and the latest trick for getting the kids to sit through church quietly.

My nap time only comes when they are both napping...which has become a rare occurence.

And now that they're both sleeping, I'm (ironically not sleeping) blogging about this crazy beautiful life that is so different from the one I used to live. I am writing about this life that is challenging, that is constantly requiring me to give of myself, that brings me to tears, that brings me to my knees, that leaves me begging God to use this family for his glory. The life that leaves me absolutely exhausted at the end of each day and absolutely overflowing with more joy than I'd ever dreamed of. The life I wouldn't trade for any of those things I used to have or care about.

1000 Gifts (16)

301. Judah's mop of red hair that lays sleeping in my arms
302. The break from the cold...warmest February weather I've known and the walks and the splashing in puddles with laughing little boys.
303. That Joe can never wait to give a gift.
304. The prayers that go up for my unborn child.
305. The anticipation of seeing the new baby boy, created just for our family.
306. Feeling so in love with him already and, yet, knowing that my heart will spill more new love...more than I ever thought possible the first time I lay eyes on him.
307. Toothy Roman grins
308. Rest. In every sense of the word.
309. All things organized (thanks to the nesting I've been doing!)
310. Videos of my sweet little nephews.
311. Family time...this means help with new baby AND good conversation, bonding, making memories.
312. Skype.
313. New doors opening.
314. Love for friends...so much that it hurts sometimes.
315. Seeing new moms savor the little things.
316. Almost four years of being a mom. Best.Job.Ever.
317. Roman concentrating so hard on writing a friend's name. The S on it's side and the proud look in his eye when he realizes he did it.
318. Seeing Judah admire babies.
319. Hide and Seek. Even when I feel like this pregnant belly can't fit into any hiding spots and I think I'm too tired for another round...the squealing delight of the finding makes it worthwhile.
320. Neatly stacked baby blankets...waiting to wrap him up.

A Few Letters...

Dear Roman,
You could not have been cuter at your big brother class last night. And I had so much fun on our McDonald's date. I love the way that you got out your "big brother" bag of goodies and showed them to me all over again today...three times. You are so adorable.

Dear Judah,
I love the way you say "my-tar" instead of "guitar". I love that you are a cuddler. I love the way you shout "yah!" when you get excited about something. I love the way you are constantly asking me for food. Tonight after you finished all of your dinner you kept saying "saushage?" Maybe Daddy will make you some for breakfast tomorrow. He has a hard time saying no to you.

Dear Joe,
I'm so thankful that you are patient with me...especially when I'm grumpy and complaining. I love that you totally understand (or at least pretend to!) when I disappear in the evening for a hot shower...and I love that I can hear you laughing with the boys when I come out. I'm so proud of how hard you work and how well you are doing at your job.

Dear DOLE,
Thank you for making the Asian Salad Kit. Its scrumtrulescent blend of flavors is delightful to my tastebuds. I'm pretty sure I could eat a whole bag in one sitting. At the current moment I would totally blame that on my unborn child...because I'm a good mom like that.

Dear Roman,
Please stop waking your brother up during "nap time". Do you know why it's called nap time? You are supposed to sleep. Or at least rest. Thirty minutes is not enough sleep for Judah to have before you wake him up to jump on the beds and wrestle in the blankets.

Dear Judah,
Please stop waking your brother up in the mornings. 4:45 is not an acceptable wake-up time. And pulling Roman's hair is certainly not an acceptable manner in which to wake him. For.the.love.

Dear Mom and Bob (and Maggie),
Thank you so much for watching the boys all the time. It's awesome to have you so close. I love that Roman and Judah get to have a great relationship with you like Jim and I had with our grandparents.

Dear Mom (mom#2 - Suellen :)).
I'm so excited and SO SO thankful that you're coming to visit when Silas is born! You are always so willing to serve. We appreciate your willingness to go out of your way to nurture our family. The boys will be so excited to play with you again!

Dear Roman,
I love how you are totally awed by everything right now. It's such a fun stage. I feel so blessed that I get to watch you experience life everyday. The joy you have in the simplest things is incredible. I want to be more like you in that way.

Dear Judah,
I really can't tell you how much your smile melts my heart. I love seeing how proud you are of yourself when you complete a puzzle. It makes me laugh to see you dancing to music. Seeing you sad literally makes me cry. Like today when you got a HUGE goose egg from running head first into the piano. Let's stick to laughing and smiling tomorrow.

Dear Joe,
Thanks for letting me sleep in on Saturdays. You are so so good to me.

Love,
Me

Big Brother

Last night was a big night for us. Roman and I got to go to Big Brother/Big Sister class at the hospital. My excitement at least equalled his, if not exceeded it, and the night lived up to our expectations.

We had been trying to prepare Roman for the class...we told him that he would have a teacher and he would get to be the student. We reminded him that it's a student's job to obey what the teacher tells him to do. I told him he would be learning all about baby Silas and he would meet other kids who were going to have new babies at their houses.

We arrived at the hospital and talked about how Roman and Judah were both born there. We walked in and found the very sweet teacher, who gave Roman his big brother button and told him how important the big brother in the family is. Roman listened very intently to everything she said. Then he was sure to tell her "I'm going to be the student". He took the whole thing very seriously. :)

Then, we met the other kids in the class and found our classroom.

The kids started by coloring on some transfer paper that was then ironed onto a bib for their baby. Then we read a book about having a new baby at home. We practiced holding baby dolls and giving gentle touches. We practiced changing the baby doll's diaper.

Then we went to tour the Birthways floor. Roman really liked riding in the elevator. We saw a brand new baby sleeping in the nursery and we toured one of the rooms. As we walked past the nurse's desk Roman was sure to say "Thank you, Nurse!" They all liked that a lot.

We finished with a snack and got some stickers and coloring books to take home with us. I was very impressed with the class and with the teacher. I have been so happy with all of our experiences at Mary Greeley. It definitely made me excited to meet our sweet baby!

Roman and I finished our little date night at McDonald's. I asked him about his favorite parts of the night. His response: "holding the baby doll".

He is going to be such a good big brother (again!)

Hopefully we can share some of his knowledge and (probably more importantly) gentleness with Judah. :)

Heaven

So, we have been reading Roman stories about some of the saints. He gets really into memorizing their names and pictures. :) One thing that we tried to reiterate about each of them was that they live in Heaven with Jesus.

It's such a blessing to get the opportunity to share the Gospel with your children. Roman can tell you that Jesus died on the cross so that we can go to Heaven. He knows that if we love Jesus then we will get to go to Heaven when we die.

We have also had conversations about how Grandpa David and other friends and family members that we love are already in Heaven.

The other day, in the middle of one of these conversations, Roman asked "Mommy, where is Heaven?"

uh...

This kind of reminded me of our "Did the Holy Spirit die on the cross?" conversation. Usually I feel like I am pretty prepared to answer his questions, but this was another time when I suddenly felt really, really not prepared.

I thought for a minute and tried again with "Heaven is where Jesus lives".

His response: "Tell me where that is, Mom."

"Well, honey, it's really hard to explain exactly where Heaven is. But it's where we go to be with Jesus when we die and it's a really wonderful place. Let Mommy think about another way to explain it."

Well, I've been thinking for a couple of days now and I am still not quite sure how to generate a 3 year old answer. If he were an adult, I feel like I might have an adequate theological response...but to Roman? How do I explain that to Roman? And how do I explain it in a way that's simple and yet truthful? It's really important to me that my answer be accurate...that's it's not some vague "up in the sky" answer that's not deeply rooted in truth.

So, my sister-in-law Angela suggested using the song Big House by Audio Adrenaline. If you rocked any youth conferences or camps in the late 90's, you know the one! :)

So, I'm thinking, this is perfect. It's a song based on what scripture says about Heaven...I can talk about more about Heaven for now...

So, I say "Roman, remember the other day when you asked me where Heaven is?"

"Yeah".

"Well, I want to tell you more about Heaven. Jesus tells us in the Bible that Heaven is our Father's house...and that there are lots of rooms and that everyone will sit down at a big banquet table together. The streets are made of gold and the sea is made of crystal! It's a beautiful place! And it's a very happy place! No one is ever sad and no one ever has to die again. Heaven is where Jesus lives. And all the angels and saints live there too. Roman, I want to show you a music video. This song tell us what Heaven will be like." (see Revelation 19 and see Revelation 21)

I pull up the video and he watches very intently through the first chorus:

come, and go with me to my Father's house

come, and go with me to my Father's house

it's a big big house with lots and lots of rooms,

a big big table with lots and lots of food,

a big big yard where we can play football,

a big big house...it's my Father's house.

and then a new question formed in young Roman's ever-inquisitive mind:

"Mom, does Jesus play football??"

SO.priceless.

It was one of the many moments that I just wanted to bottle up and hold onto forever.

**********************

For the record, at the end of the video, he still asked where Heaven is.

Like I said, I don't want to give him an answer that isn't truth. So, if anyone else has a good 3 year old answer to that question, I'd love any suggestions!

Thoughts on Pregnancy

I am currently 37 weeks pregnant with my third child. And it is nothing less than miraculous. Maybe that sounds cliche but, let me tell you, I mean it with the utmost sincerity from my heart. I love being pregnant. A friend of mine recently asked me why I so loved this whole experience and I thought I would share a few things that have become crystal clear to me, and/or things that have left me full of awe in this incredible journey. I don't want to forget the precious things about this season of my life.





The whole design of marriage and sexuality and pregnancy is just astounding. It's amazing to me that God made men and women so that we don't make sense apart from each other. Like lock and key we fit together and, in that union, we are able to partner with Him to create life. The weight of this reality is overlooked so often in our society. We don't realize, I mean, we don't really comprehend that each time we choose to become one, there is opportunity for life. what.a.blessing.





I love the feeling of a baby moving inside of me. It's the craziest way to bring a new person in the world, but I'm so glad that He made it that way.





I love that, when I'm pregnant (and aside from the times when I'm complaining about aches and pains or heartburn...oh, the heartburn...), my body is doing what it was created to do. Yes, our first BLESSING was fertility:

Gen 1:28

God blessed them and said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply".

How often do we hear fertility referred to as a blessing? I wish it were a more common way of thinking. I never get over the "wow factor" of being with child.





I love that I get to be a living, breathing pro-life witness. Babies are a gift from God. Nothing says it more clearly than a pregnant woman.





I love that my husband is proud to have a pregnant wife.

I love that pregnancy gives us the opportunity to share more of our story with people. It seems that people are more open to discussing children/family/your beliefs when they can see that you are pregnant. I am happy that we can answer people's honest questions. For example, we have heard a lot of this one: "Do you think you'll have more?" or "Will you keep trying until you get a girl?" They are totally innocent and genuine questions, and are in no way offensive. I'm glad that gives us the chance to talk about how we use NFP and how we discern God's will for our family on a monthly basis. It's a really novel concept to some...I think because many people don't necessarily consider fertility something to discern.

I love that, especially as a woman, this experience connects me to women all over the world.





I love that this life-giving love connects me to our Blessed Mother. Since experiencing pregnancy and parenting, I have reflected so much more on the life of Mary and the role that she played in Salvation history.





I love that at communion, when the priest presents the host and says "this is my body given up for you", I have a little bit more understanding about the meaning of those words.





I love that, in labor, I get to share a tiny amount of Christ's suffering, knowing that it will ultimately bring life and love. It makes me understand why we call it his Passion.


There are so many other reasons that could be listed, but these are a few that are especially dear to my heart.


PS - I would like to be praying for all of you while I am in labor. Leave a comment or send me an e-mail letting me know how I can be praying for you and for your family!

Weakness

I have been feeling like a bad mom rather inadequate this week. Do you ever get in those slumps? The ones where you feel like you're just trying to "make it through" your day? Where surviving with a few ounces of sanity becomes the goal?

I hate feeling that way.

But, the reality is that it happens. Maybe it's just to me, but I'm guessing that some other people have felt this way before.

I could make a thousand excuses for myself - the boys haven't been sleeping as well now that they share a room, and I am 8 months pregnant and tired, and it's been so cold that we coudn't play outside and I'm crazy emotional about nothing most days, and I just need more "me" time, and on and on and on...

But I have come to realize that excuses don't change anything. I said that I hate getting to the end of my day and feeling like I haven't been purposeful, like I haven't enjoyed the little moments. If I hate it, then what has to change in order for me to change?

Not that some of those things don't factor into making a stressful day, but most of my problem right now is that I have been horribly inconsistent about having my God time. Meaning, it hasn't happened all week. How am I supposed to be giving my children good, Godly parenting when I'm not receiving it myself?

The real heart of the problem is not any of the exhausting things about having little boys. The heart of the problem is that my heart is not in the right place. I am trying and trying to make our house run smoothly and be a good mom and feel like we accomplished something by the end of the day.

But It's not about me.

If I want to give my boys love...true love...Love Himself, then it's about time to realize that this whole journey or parenting and family is about Him. I will never be capable of doing it all and doing it perfectly. The key is surrender. Because His power is made perfect in my weakness.

How freeing!

I don't want to miss out on the right nows...even the times when I feel like I can't possibly say "Judah, please don't climb that" in a nice way one more time. Because they are only little once. And I know there will come a day when I will miss saying that.

***

And how about you, dear friends, what do you do to ensure that you spend a purposeful day being truly present with your kiddos?

A Little Bit of Everything

It's about time for an update on my little guys...although I am realizing that soon I will have to call them my big boys, since they are going to have a new baby brother in 6 weeks. (SIX weeks?? Seriously. How can that be?)

Anyway, I feel like I don't even know where to start since it's been so long...so let's start with Christmas....because, well, why not?

As you can imagine, since we hadn't seen Joe's parents since last Christmas, the anticipation of their arrival was just about enough to push us overboard. I even felt like a little kid, counting down the hours.

I really wish I would have videotaped Roman's reaction when they came in the door. He was way more excited about Grandma and Grandpa coming than he was about Santa (which is fine with me). He had been talking about it for weeks and his poor little body could just NOT contain the excitment. Have you seen the Saturday Night Live skit, "Surprise Party"? If you haven't, do yourself a favor and click on that link. So.Funny.

Anyway, Roman's reaction reminded me of that girl. He ran up and down the hall and all around the living room just screaming and laughing like crazy. It was awesome.

Their stay was filled with laughter, good conversation, celebrating, shopping, napping, movies, presents, trips to Dutch Oven Bakery (SO much sugar), lots of love and attention from aunts and uncle, singing, Mass, toy trains, horsey rides, playing in the snow, Settlers of Catan, Apples to Apples, and too many other fun things to list. If you really want a good recap, you should watch Mary's video. You can find it here.

Oh. And Roman's first Christmas play.

Yep. Roman was a cow in his first theatrical production. Some friends of ours from church, that homeschool their kids, like to do monthly recitals at one of the local nursing homes. So, they invited us to join them for their Christmas play. I would like to tell you that Roman was a natural on stage but, well...let me just show you:

Do you see the cow? Riding the horse? Directly in front of the Holy Family?

And here...rearranging the set. This one honestly makes me laugh out loud every time.


I'm not saying he doesn't have a future in theatre, I'm just saying we might need to reign it in a little.



In all seriousness, he did pretty well and he had a lot of fun. We just need to figure out how to get through to him that he is not, in fact, the center of attention at all times.

Anyway, it took us a while to recover from the withdrawl of all the Pomettos leaving. And since then? Well, we've had some big changes when it comes to living arrangements. And by "we" I mean Roman and Judah.

It was early in December that Judah (just shy of 18 months old at the time) learned how to climb out of his crib. As I have mentioned, he climbs just about everything, so honestly, I was surprised we made it that far. Anyway, we avoided moving him to a "big boy bed" for a while because we weren't quite sure how to go about doing it, since he would be sharing a room with Roman. After Joe's parents left, though, it was time to break down and make the switch.

It went surprisingly well. It only took a few days/nights of trial and error before we figured out our system. For a while we had revert back to rocking him all the way to sleep before putting him in the room. Although now he is getting the hang of putting himself to sleep in there. The catch is that we can't put both boys in there awake. Otherwise they just spend hours jumping on the bed and laughing, which is cute, until they end up super grumpy the next day.

So, we usually put Judah down and then give him about half an hour to fall asleep and then add Romant to the room. Roman doesn't wake Judah if he's already asleep, which is great. I can't say the same for Judah, though. If he is awake in there and realizes that Roman isn't...well, he just hops right into bed with him and smacks him on the head until he wakes up. So, if we put Roman down first we have to rock Judah to sleep before putting him in there.

Anyway, that was two whole paragraphs of probably way more than anyone cares to know about bedtime routines. Riveting.

On to the funnies!!

Roman:

• one day I was playing with Roman while Judah was supposed to be napping. We could hear him getting into the closet when Roman said "Judah's not very good at sleepin." No, no he's not.
• one day at the mall, the boys discovered the "rides" - meaning the horse that rocks at about .3 mph. Too bad we weren't even nice enough to put a quarter in them. Oh, well, they were very entertained by the not-moving rides for quite a while.
• this is one of my all-time favorites: One day I was asking Roman about all the fun things he was going to with our family when they were here for Christmas. I said "Roman, what do you think you'll do with Grandma when she comes to our house?" He thought seriously for a while and said "She'll probably want to play hide and seek and watch Milo & Otis." That gave me a little chuckle and I said "yeah, she probably will". He went on to tell me that Theresa would want to watch Frosty and Rudolph and that Angela would want to go downstairs and watch Veggie Tales. Good guesses all around. Then I said "Oh! Roman! I bet I know what Grandpa will want to do when he's here! He will want to take you to the bakery to eat donuts!" Roman was very excited about this. He said "YEAH! And Grandpa has a gooood mustache!" Seriously! What a funny kid!
• Roman also likes to copy the things that I say, so when Judah gets up in the morning, I'll often hear Roman say things like "There's my sweet Judah" in a very syrupy tone :)
• One day I was singing along to some Matt Maher. It's the current favorite around here. Roman said "Mommy, let Matt Maher sing it". Thanks a lot.
• On the morning that the Pomettos left I reminded Roman that Grandma and Grandpa were going to have to go back to South Carolina. He responded, sadly, with "Is that today?"
• Roman has been turning over his puzzles and putting them together with the blank side up. What does that mean?
• Both of the boys are really into this game: "Mommy!! I got SOMETHING for your BIRTHDAY!!" which is followed by them bringing me a basket or a bag full of random toys. It's pretty hilarious and I love that Judah has caught on. His version is slightly less understandable but it's in the exact same tone that Roman says it!

Speaking of Judah:

• When we say bedtime prayers Judah often thanks Jesus for Nemo, Dory, and Crush. Can you tell what the current movie of choice is at our house??
• He also asks for food all the time. Occasionally we'll be riding in the car or playing with toys and he'll suddenly ask "Chicken?" or "Fries?" "Cake?" "Donuts?" Notice the nutritious trend in those questions.
• Judah LOVES the David books. (as does Roman. And what's not to love?) they are really cute and funny. It just priceless how excited gets about "Dayid". They are the first books that he has been able to sort of "read" on his own. He had Oh, David memorized after about a week of borrowing it from the library. :)
• Some of my other favorite things he says right now: "here comes!" (this is mostly when he's waiting for a song or video to come on.) "Oh no, wha happened?", "Yemme see it", "Are Far" for Our Father, and "Far, Sah, Hoh Spirr, Maymen" when attempting to make the sign of the cross.
• Judah is starting to understand giving kisses...like he actually aims for your mouth occasionally. It's pretty scary, though. I'm usually afraid one of three things will happen: 1. He will bite my nose. 2. He will slip a little tongue in there. 3. He will miss the mouth and get slobber all over my face. But it is still, somehow, melts my heart and he's very proud of himself when he gets a good reaction out of someone.

Silas:

• has been making me eat: Italian food, spicy things - especially buffalo chicken, and occasionally some sweets here and there - mostly chocolate, but one night it was powdered sugar donuts. Joe was nice enough to stop at a gas station and get me some that night. Although then he had to tell me: "You know, you like to pretned you have this really refined taste, but when it comes down to it, you have really podunk cravings." He cracks me up.
• Is moving around all the time. I love it.
• is going to be here so soon! I can hardly believe how fast this pregnancy has gone. You can read Roman's birth story here and Judah's here. I can only pray that Silas' will be similar to Judah's. :)
• Thanks so much for praying for him and for our family. We will never be able to thank you enough.

Alright...that's enough about us for tonight! Leave a comment and let me know how we can be praying for you! God Bless your weekend!

No Sled? No Problem.

yeah...I'm a little behind.

Remember this post about playing in the snow? From almost a month ago??

Well, I thought it was time that I finally followed up on that. I'm sure you've all been waiting on the edges of your seats in anticipation. Or, more likely, you probably don't remember that post at all . :)

Either way, you've got to see this:

1. Why yes, yes that is a recycling bin and a jump rope. I can actually hear Jeff Foxworthy making millions of dollars off of a new "You Might Be a Redneck..." joke.

2. Joe was so excited about doing something fun with the boys in the snow that he dug around in the garage until he found something to take the place of the sled-that-we-don't-have. Pretty awesome dad. And the boys loved it.

3. As Tony so eloquently put it: "Now it doesn't matter how awesome of a sled you buy...your kids will always want you to drag them around in the recycling bin." Sweet.

4. Priceless memory right here. Love my boys.

The Holy Family

The King in her womb made her visibly great with child. She had grown beautifully large with Grace himself. Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

Her skin streched thin over the coming Christ child.
Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.

The Savior was knit together within her, now a living tabernacle.

And I wonder at the anticipation she must have had. Much like the anticipation all women feel

who have carried a babe. But this...this was different. This was the Son of the Most High. The heir to David's throne.

But her very life sustained his.

And she loved Him as I love mine.

And her Joseph...

I have often thought how my Joseph was appropriately named. My Joseph is much like this Godly man. A quiet hero, who needs no aknowledgement though he deserves much. A man who sacrifices all for his family. Who is obedient without a big display.

And this family is so beautiful.

I pray that our family would grow to be more like this one.